If this premise sounds like a certain best-selling work of narrative nonfiction that introduced millions of readers to the majesty of the White City and the devilish doings of the alleged serial killer, you’d be right … and terribly wrong. This self-described “independent passion project” is a raucously irreverent but captivating retelling, with plenty of historical tidbits expanded and lampooned for added enjoyment.
Episode 1 was on released April 15, 2023, and the “thrillingly stupid, three-part conclusion” (their description, not ours!) dropped on August 13, 2024.
In Episode 1: “The Resurrectionists” we meet a young H.H. Holmes gas-lighting (figuratively; the real gruesome stuff comes later, we expect) his landlady. Then the action moves to the assemblage of architects anxiously planning the Columbian Exposition fairgrounds (“No steamboats!” insists one designer), and finally to a scene of ridicule of the clueless-but-conniving Patrick Eugene Prendergast. Oh, and there is an unusual commercial break for The Columbian Cookbook by Adelaide Hollingsworth that would make anyone want to quit smoking.
Episode 2: “The Irony Wheel” revolves (get it?) around plans for the giant metal centerpiece of the Midway Plaisance, but only after a string of proposals for truly terrible towers of terror. And speaking of which … an unconventional hotel starts going up near the Fair. You can check-out any time you like, but can you ever leave? How can you generate gold spinning a wheel? Listen and find out.
Episode 3: “Nobody Wants to Work Anymore!” (They are talking about 1893, right?) introduces listeners to a very confident Sophia Hayden trying to complete her architectural work on the Woman’s Building while resisting the meddling of Bertha Palmer. We also hear about Chicago entrepreneur James McElroy’s incredible plan (but did it really happen?) to pump spring water from Waukesha, Wisconsin, over 100 miles to the fairgrounds in Jackson Park. Dirtboy advises that this episode (released September 21, 2023) is NSFW.
Episode 4: “Buying the Pharm” focuses on H.H. Holmes. He’s the bad guy.
Episode 5: “Slavery’s Over, Go Nuts!” takes us into the Fair. The Exposition is finally open, and civil rights activists Frederick Douglass and Ida B. Wells meet with Burnham and other architects and officials to raise their concerns. The episode touches on some famous fairgoers, Colored American Day, racist satire from Puck Magazine, a terrified man riding the Ferris Wheel, the Ice Railway accident , the Cold Storage Building fire, and the Columbian Guard handling inane questions from visitors.
Episode 6: “Homeless Escargot” focuses mostly on Holmes (still the bad guy), but also cycles back to the latest of Mr. Prendergast (another bad guy).
Episode 7: “The Penal Gallery” has Burnham and other Builders of the Fair gathering on October 29, 1893, to reflect on their successes and shortcomings. Sullivan ungags Dirt Boy and—surprise!—reveals his identity. (We didn’t see that coming, and will offer the hint that he once wrote: “I’m all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let’s start with typewriters.”) Prendergast’s commits his dastardly deed, and rodent fricassee is served up. [We’ll just note that the Captive Balloon ride did not employ a “hot-air balloon.” The balloon was filled with hydrogen, which—unlike hot air—is highly combustible.]
Episode 8: “Chicago P.D. & Porkery” focuses on those bad guys.
Episode 9: “Founder’s Syndrome” has Burnham, Atwood, and Olmsted standing in the smoldering remains of the fairground in 1894, contemplating their legacy. Olmsted’s vision for Jackson Park will never be tampered with, right? Stay tuned for onw final advert for Mrs. Adelaide Hollingsworth’s Columbia Cook Book.
No Holmes Barred! is available on YouTube and through many major podcast services.
“No steamboats!”